Chapter #4 “Better Safe than Sorry”

Chapter#4

“Better Safe than Sorry”

 

"You need to grow up, Kiera"
We had just finished dinner and  were  taking a walk around the neighbourhood.
The misgivings of the day were forgotten. I wasn't heartbroken but Karan  was-for me.
"It was just fun Bhai  let it go" I tried to cheer him up.
Somehow the idiotic talk in the car had pushed Karan into a cocoon of solitude. He had the same expression of the day Shyla was lost and his eyes again said, "I miss her"
I think every depressing event pushed him into  that zone and  this time I was guilty.
" Let it go" he calmly repeated after me and sighed.
I patted his back and somehow that was the trigger!
"Seriously what were  you thinking!" He shouted. I warned you and you won't listen.
" Why are you over reacting?" I retorted.
" coz ur stupid Kiera! What did u think this is your fucking  jee Le apni  zindagi trip. Just coz ur in Europe u need to find ur soul mate! !" Karan burst out.
He was referring  to DDLJ.

I let him vent out his misplaced anger.
He made sense. Or did he?
Well I was stupid.
We kept walking in silence after that and only when he had sufficiently calmed down I made my speech.
" It's not that I was in love or something. And we just  met  yesterday. It was just a stupid crush. I will grow out of it." I assured him.
He put his arm around me and we turned to walk back home.
" A young , very handsome guy on his solo trip to THE CITY is hanging out with his sister! This calls for a vodka!" He remarked and we both laughed.
" A pretty, young girl is hanging out with her ugly brother, this calls for a smoke" I repeated his sentiment.
" Shall we?" Karan's eyes grew wide with excitement.
We both smoked occasionally. Well, technically he did, I just held it and let it die out. Dad was strictly against it and no one knew. It was our way of teenage rebellion. I had caught Karan trying his first cigarette and just to save his ass  he let me try too.

Frankly, I hated it. But it was time to show solidarity to my brother as Karan  loved it.

We found a gas station, made our purchase and smoked our way home.

Alekh opened the door even before Karan could insert our set of keys.
" I was looking for you guys... I am headed out. You guys want to join?"
I looked at my watch. It was 11 pm. Karan  was caught in a dilemma of camaraderie towards me and well, being a guy.
I feigned a yawn to back off but none of the guys did. Karan  won't go without me and Alekh kept pestering. I didn't want to play a spoilsport so I joined them.
" We aren't driving?" Karan  asked as Alekh  walked in opposite direction to the garage.
"Nope, not unless you plan to return sober. I for one don’t, we take a taxi" he laughed.
And faltered as he saw my sombre expression
" you guys do drink right? I totally forgot! He asked and continued  for himself "Girls don't drink in India. It's frowned upon. I forgot. I am sorry"
I looked at Karan and both of us burst out laughing. 
We just had had a fag.
It was crush over for me! End of deal!
Karan looked at me as I asked Alekh " How good is your Hindi? "
He was confused. " Very bad. I grew up in boarding school. I just know few words. Why?"
" Nothing " I smiled " I do drink " I replied firmly  and murmured " Crush over Bhai! This guy is plain ignorant. " in Hindi only for Karan to hear.
Karan laughed.
"Well I never get drunk, so I can drive" Karan asked for the keys and Alekh had an “are-you-sure” expression on his face before he passed his car  keys to him.
" I like you a lot buddy, we are going to have fun in college" Alek said as he mentally appointed Karan as his wingman for future.

After a short ride we were  in a noisy bar ordering our drinks.

" I am paying" Alekh announced as he passed me the menu.
I looked at Karan  as we both sneered at the overpriced  drinks.
" Long island iced tea" I ordered and Alekh  raised  his brows. So much so for his prejudices.
Minutes changed to hours as we enjoyed the music and each other’s company.  I was pretty wasted by then, but Karan  still was sober.  I didn't notice that he stopped  drinking long back and didn't realise that it was to for me.
It was after a few hours that Karan went to get the next round of drinks. We could see him at the overcrowded bar  and I was alone with Alekh.
"Enjoying?" He asked me and I nodded.
I was a bit light headed by then.
" By the way, I might not know the language but I do know when I am being made fun of" he added.
I was embarrassed.  Do I apologise? The alcohol found me the right answer for the moment.
"I know. That was pretty lame  of me" I replied nonchalantly.
" What offended you?" Alekh asked and kept looking at me.
I just shrugged and filled my mouth with  sauce dipped  fries.
What offended me?  A big question which a 17 year Kiera couldn't answer. Perhaps it was the heartbreak of morning, perhaps it was my coping mechanism. It wasn't my nature to be rude, but I was, in an effort to be “un-affected”.
He still kept looking at me and then  out of nowhere raised his hand to wipe the sauce from near my lower lip and let it rest there for a moment more than necessary. I had not expected this and so I shuddered.
" I have a boyfriend" I blurted out on autopilot.
This time he shrugged and again fake wiped my lower lip. I think he was wasted too.
The evening was pretty uncomfortable  then on. My actions since my arrival caught up to me as I regretted throwing myself at Alekh. I was ashamed  of myself. Suddenly  I just wanted to cry. A lot. Maybe it was the effect of alcohol. But all I wanted was get back to India where I knew I was safe. Karan  joined us and somehow understood that I wasn't in the bar anymore. I was home.
"Everything's okay? He asked me and I nodded.
" You want to go home now?" He asked again and I nodded again.
Alekh kept looking at both of us.
"We leave after finishing this, will that be okay?" Karan asked me referring to the drinks he just brought.
I nodded again.
"It's okay, we can leave now" Alekh interrupted but I refused as I gathered myself.
And so the small talk started again.
" You know I miss my brother as I see you guys together" Alekh remarked. " Though we aren't as close as you two seem  to be"
We just smiled. I wasn't in the mood to chat anymore and Karan knew something was amiss. I didn't want to explain anything to him later and I knew he would ask. So I tried covering up and making small talk.

" How old is your brother? Arjun  right?"
" He just turned 18, but looks older than me" he replied as he got up to remove his wallet from the back pocket of his jeans.
" Here's him" he said pushing the wallet in my hands.  And I looked at a well-built gym toned  man with a big arm tattoo standing shirtless  next to Alekh on  a beach.
" He sure looks older than you" Karan  remarked. "And wow that's some  serious gymming"
"Look Keira, you think  I should start gymming" he asked me.
" please don't. I hate that" I made a face.
" I think it looks cool" Karan was still looking at the pic.
" I think it's mechanical" I replied.
"Can I have that back please?" Alekh laughed as both of  us kept passing his wallet between us.
" you know baba  would ask us every vacation if we wanted to go to India visit you guys and we always said no. My mistake I guess. Missed this fun" Alekh remarked as Karan was flexing his biceps at me and I was sneering.
"Be jealous dude, we are the coolest kids on the block." The alcohol had gone to my head now. "you don't know what all you missed".
" I will catch up Kiera, pretty soon" Alekh said and winked at me.
I was back to being uncomfortable.
I woke up with a headache the next morning.  Events of last night replayed in my mind and I just wanted to do one thing.
I raced down the stairs to the kitchen. Karan and Alekh were having breakfast.
" Can I use the phone?" I asked and even before Alekh nodded a yes. I was dialling.
Purab’s father picked up and I passed it to Karan. He faked a name and asked for Purab. Soon Purab was on the line.
" Where are you calling from? He whispered and I knew his father was in the room.
" London, I will be back in 2 weeks"
"Okay" he was back to being monosyllabic. That was his problem. Every weekend  if we didn't meet he would take the whole Monday to get comfortable  with me again.
" Will meet then, okay?" I said just because I wanted to feel okay.
"Okay" he said again.
We both went silent.
" Purab, I need to tell you something " I whispered as I walked with the cordless out of the kitchen.
"What?" He asked and I pictured his face. The days we spent in the canteen  together, the day he went out of his way and  nature to get me that rose and propose.
" Nothing. I miss you" I said and I knew he would have stiffened there as I never was vocal before. I wasn't  lying. I did miss him. I was the little bird who just learnt flying and wanted the warmth of my home again.
" We will meet when you are back" He repeated my words.
I kept the phone and entered the kitchen again. Radio was on with some song playing.
Karan  was drinking his glass of juice and Alekh  was singing with the radio. As he saw me he pushed a plate of eggs in front of me.
I sat beside Karan and He ruffled my hair.
" Everything's okay" I smiled at him. I had seen sense.  Karan just nodded.
"So finally you called your boyfriend." Alekh asked out of nowhere.
" yes I did"
He still looked great in an old tattered tee and jeans with just out of shower wet hair but I was finally un-affected.
" I am sorry for last night" , " I should not have made fun of you, was just amused by your prejudices, but then realised it’s what you have heard and maybe is true statistically. Not everyone grew up the way Dad brought us up"  I was blabbering.
He didn't reply. Just his signature “Hmm…mmm”
Karan kept sipping at his juice in his effort to remain out of the conversation.
Alekh turned up the radio and continued his chores.

I understood why he turned it up as Nsync was playing-
"I don't want to be your fool in this game for two
So I'm leaving you behind
(Bye bye bye)
I don't want to make it tough

(Make it tough)
But I've had enough
(Bye bye)
And it ain't no lie"